You Might Be in Education If ...

  1. You believe the staff room should be equipped with a Valium salt lick.

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  2. You find humor in other people's stupidity.

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  3. You want to slap the next person who says "Must be nice to work 8 to 3:30 and have your summers free."

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  4. You believe chocolate is a food group.

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  5. You can tell it's a full moon without ever looking outside.

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  6. You believe that unspeakable evils will befall you if anyone says "Boy, the kids sure are mellow today."

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  7. When out in public you feel the urge to snap your fingers at a child you do not know and correct their behavior.

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  8. You have no time for a life from August to June.

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  9. Marking all A's on report cards would make your life SO much simpler.

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  10. You laugh uncontrollably when people refer to the staff room as the "lounge."

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  11. You can't have children because there's no name you could give a child that wouldn't bring on high blood pressure the moment you heard it uttered.

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  12. You think caffeine should be available to staff in IV form.

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  13. You know you're in for a MAJOR project when a parent says "I have a great idea I'd like to discuss.  I think it would be such fun."

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  14. You smile weakly, and want to choke a person when he/she says "Oh, you must have such FUN every day.  This must be like playtime for you."

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  15. Your personal life comes to a screeching halt at report card time.

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  16. Meeting a child's parent instantly answers the question "Why is this kid like this?"